Feelings - Sad and Blue

Today I feel sad - really, truly sad -
and I know that that's really bad - but I can't help it...
Today I just feel like having a good cry -
but still I try to smile the tears away - though I can't...

I know it's not right and it's not real -
to be living in a world of make belief - but still I do...
I know it's getting harder each day to go on pretending -
yet I do, and cover the truth rather well - or presume I do...

And this misery is eating into me - slowly but surely -
and I just wonder how long I can hold on...
Before the volcano erupts and spew out its burning lava -
before the world starts to point out - and call me a liar...
Before the twigs break under extreme pressure -
before the heart succumbs to all this spiritual torture...
and lay broken in a hundred thousand tiny pieces -
while the world still shakes its head with displeasure...

Thank you for your love

Thank you - for loving me the way you do -
selflessly, intensely, with your whole heart and soul...
thank you - and i do hope you'll love me true -
for that's how i do truly feel for you, too...

You give me days of peace and joy -
and plant that smile on my lips...
and in my eyes, the sparkle of love is there -
whenever i look you in the eye...

So i say a little prayer every day -
that your love will always be there...
to fill all the empty crevices in my heart -
and make each day better than the last...

What Life Has Taught Me

I've always been afraid of standing up alone -
like a creeper in the garden, i needed support...
i've always wanted to stretch out and climb higher -
but my roots hold me down, my tendrils make me cling on...
i've always been second best: the best was never meant to be mine -
only the bravest and the brainiest get the best - i had always thought...

But now i strive to beat the rest: compete to be the best -
to stand out: head and shoulders above all the others in a crowd...
i've conquered my fear of being left all, all alone in a hostile crowd -
for i have faith in my friends, and believe that those i love will lend support...
i have faith in God, and have come to realise that He helps those who help themselves
so now i am ready: from my tendrils i'll break free, and reach out for the sun high above...

If a teardrop can make a ripple in a lake

If a raindrop can make a hole -
when it lands in a dessert or on a plain...
if a dewdrop can revive the grass and the plants -
before the morning sun is high up in the sky...
if a teardrop can make a ripple -
when it falls on the face of a pool or lake...
then i know that you can hear my voice in a crowd -
like a song in the silence of the night...
and i know that you'll know what i wish to say -
from the look in the dark pools of my eyes...
and i know that your love is steadfast and true -
when i see that little twinkle as you look me in the eye...

"I cried a tear"

"I cried a tear - you wiped it dry;
i was confused - you cleared my mind..."
yes, you have always been there for me -
when i'm feeling sad or feeling down...
you've always brushed away the teardrop -
and made me laugh, before the next teardrop falls...
you've been all that i have and ever will -
my pillar of strength, and my pool of joy...
you've given me hope, when times are bad -
and made me happy, when life's a drag...

So stay with me, and never wander off too far -
for i would always love to keep you in sight, be it near or far...
i would never tire of tracing your footsteps, in the mud or sand -
and wait for the day when we could leave two sets of footprints, in the sand...

I know, and i understand

When a relationship breaks up -
someone has to suffer the heartbreaking news...
when a relationship breaks up -
it's not easy to be happy when another is heart broken...
for though a lukewarm relationship has to come to a final end -
the pain of losing a loved one is never easy to bear...
coz all kinds of tiny little somethings -
bring back nostalgic memeories that remind you of him...

i know and i do understand the pain and sorrow -
coz i do feel for you and share your pain...
when a beautiful dream vapourised and all that is left -
are just beautiful memories of a once beautiful dream...
when you caught a familiar face,
from the window of a speeding train...
when you caught a familiar whisper,
as the wind sighs through the trees...

i do know and i do understand
the familiar pain... and the familiar sorrow...
when a relationship breaks off -
and love floats away...

I would - if only i could

I would have loved to talk about my friend -
and praise him no end - for all the good things he'd done...
i would have loved to sit with my friend -
and chat about everything under the sun...
i would really love to hear his witty jokes -
and would love to laugh out loud at all his humour...
and there's one more thing i would like to do:
see everyone hold their stomach and laugh...
and laugh wholeheartedly, uncontrolably, with them -
i surely would - if i only could...

"Like a song in the night"

If i train my ears -
i could hear the tortured cry from your heart ...
like a sad, sad song -
in the silence of the night...
and if i close my eyes -
i could see the gaunt look in your tired eyes...
and my heart cries for you -
like the raindrops falling in the night...
and when i take a walk in the park -
and hear the distant laughter of happy children...
i could feel your heart ache all around me -
like the monsoon wind that howls in the trees...
and when i squint my eyes to look at the beautiful sun -
i'll remember the shadow of your warm smile...
and it pains my heart to realise -
that the mischievous twinkle in your eyes are gone...

Thank you for the stars

I wish to say, "Thank you" -
for the stars that shine in my eyes...
allow me to just say, "Thank you" -
for you are the one who placed them there...
"Thank you" is all that i can say -
for all your kindness,your love and care...
"Thank you" is a mere expression to say -
for all that you have done for me...
Just two little words that mean the world -
just two little words to tell you apart from the world...
For you have done what others could not -
or would not,and perhaps might not...
To bring the smile back to my lips -
and the joy back into my heart...
you have put me on a pedestal -
when others try to push me down...
you have wiped away my tears -
and put a star in their place...
"Thank you, thank you, thank you" -
are the two words that keep on echoing in my heart...

Like the sunflower

Yes, i will always follow you -
wherever you may wish to go...
i'll be there with you, in mind and in spirit -
like the sunflower that traces the steps of the sun...
for i've given all my love, my heart, my soul -
in return for your love, your heart, your all...

You've showered me with all the love the world has to give -
you've shown me what kindness really means...
and how truly selfless a person can really be -
that i deem it quite impossible not to love you in return...
for all the kind deeds that only you can do -
for all the love that your big heart can hold...

So, i thank God for sending you my way -
and will trace your footsteps like the sunflower tracing the sun...

"Words are all i have"

It's true that words are all that i have,
to say that i care -
but sometimes those words
just don't come easily...
so i just hope that you'll understand,
all that i wish to say -
for it's also true
that words don't come easily to me,
and i can't find just the right words
to say what and how i feel -
and i can't seem to find the right words
to express those feelings,
to say just exactly how much
i care for you -
and see the smile spread on your lips
and touch your eyes...

What is life?

Many a time have i asked this well-asked question -
and many a time have i pondered over the answers...
and as time passes i ask it still -
and often ponder over the answers still...
for ones outlook on life changes -
as one goes through the challenges in life...

I've seen the beautiful moments in life -
and have also been through the dregs and hiccups in life...
i've been to places that i love -
and met beautiful people that i have grown to love...
i've tried my best to do what i feel is right -
and to change what i think i can and might...

I've learnt to swallow my pride and pour out my feelings -
i've learnt to not just say what is right...
but to thresh out all the wrongs, with all my feelings -
and all my might, just to put them right...
i've also tried to reason out and talk over what is wrong or right -
as i believe there's a way to make everything alright...

Thus, i've come to realise that all my wisdom and my might -
come with a patient, understanding and forgiving heart...
and that i've come to join the respected elite clubbe -
i've reached that golden age of the old and wise...
i've come a long way to achieve that status, at last:
of being experienced, thoughtful and mindful of others: wise...

Loving Life and the Little Little Things that i Can Do

Yes, there are many, many things that i can do -
now that i've attained that age of respected 'maturity'
now that my graying brows are showing beneath the graying hair -
telling the world that i've attained that covetted 'Age of Respect'...
and speaking to young teachers embarking on a long life of helping others -
i feel the respect due as they look upon my graying hair and graying brows...

For when one has attained that age of being close to 60 -
one is expected to be (and no doubt should be) 'older and wiser'...
and if others don't listen when one is 20 or 30 - they'll listen now -
when one is graying at the temples - at 58, coming on to 60...
and if one lonely shrill voice was not heard at 25 or 35 - it will be now -
now that that one voice is backed by thousands of maturing young 'fans'...

So, i'll do what i can, for as long as i can - and spread this legacy:
the feeling of joy when loving others before oneself, and giving unreservedly...

"The darkest hour is the best time to see the stars"

Life has its ups and downs -
its happy moments, and its equally sad ones...
life has a way of springing surprises -
when one is down in the dumps...
to bring us up from the slumps -
to be sailing up on the clouds again...

I suppose i'm no exception -
like you, i've had my fair share...
of being there, down in the dumps -
as well as up, sailing on Cloud 9...
and yet Destiny has it all up her mysterious sleeves -
and she has a say in all that happens to you and me...

So i've come to accept the ups and the downs in life -
and to go on with an open heart and an open mind...
for whatever must come, let it come -
and whatever must happen, will surely happen...
so i'll just accept them all as part and parcel of life -
grieve when i'm truly sad, and rejoice when i'm really glad...

After all the sunshine

Today the sun shone brightly in the sky -
with the promise of a lovely sunny day...
but not for long, as morning showers stole away my sun -
and gloomy clouds brought gloomy thoughts to mind...

This is one of those days -
when i should be happy, but i'm not...
it is one of those moments in life -
that one yearns for the impossible...

It is one of those days -
when it is easier to cry than to smile...
one of those moments in life -
when laughing is just a mirthless crackle...

It is just one of those times -
when the heart aches for something beyond one's reach...
one of those sad, sad moments -
when dark clouds are sailing in one's heart and soul...

It is one of those moments -
that one lets oneself dream of the impossible dream...

Saying THANK YOU to you

Yes, i've been on cloud nine lately -
things seem to be workng well with me...
it is not easy to make 81 young hearts happy -
but i'd made it possible - albeit with a lot of help...
it is not easy to please each and every one -
but i've tried to accommodate as many as i can...
it is not easy to get only praises and approval -
so i've accepted criticisms, taken them in my stride...
I've been told it's impossible with no funds -
but i have carrried it through with zero fund...
i've gone through the nightmare of having to admit failure -
but instead met with great success, albeit with lots of help...

So i thank God for His great help -
just as i would my friends for theirs...
i thank God for showing me the way -
and friends for making it that way...
and though i've played a small part in everything -
i'm really, truly, unexpressably glad...
that so many friends went out of their way -
to help make, what i had started, a success...

No words can thank you enough -
for all that you have put in, for our success...
no one can refute the fact that you've worked hard -
and worked well into the night, even...
all for the sake of 80 eager young hearts -
and to uphold our motto: LEARNING IS FUN!

And for all these, i thank you, my dear friends -
for helping me make my dream camp come true...

Feeling Sad

Tonight i feel sad - my heart a lump of lead -
it is just one of those moments when one feels utterly sad...
a passing whisper... carried by the wind... a memory... a remark -
wrings the heart with unconsolable sorrow...
and hot tears sting the eyes - but would not fall -
to give relieve, or to lighten that lump of lead...
and i'll remember, every time i am sad:
that tonight my lonely heart had cried, but my stinging eyes were dry...
tonight i had felt the great sorrow wring my heart -
but could not find relief, for the tears have dried...
a long, long time ago -
when the heart had died...
but the recollection of all the pain and sorrow -
centers on you, and rests on your words tonight...

"No man is an island"

Man is a social being, seldom a loner -
for man loves to air his opinion,
to put into words, even his most private thoughts,
to champion his rights, fight for justice,
to speak out his mind, and his heart,
to seek approval, to be appreciated...
so man is a social being -
one who can never survive alone...

I used to value my privacy, alone in my own world -
enjoyed my own company, enjoyed being alone...
took long walks, alone; watched the sunrise, alone -
i used to love reading, writing, and knitting - alone...
i used to love gardening, cooking and decorating my home -
but now i read biographies, simple technology and even history...
not just literary scripts, biology, and geography -
write out my feelings, knit my thoughts, and share my feelings...
watch my garden cease to bloom, cook only when necessary -
and take pains to groom myself, more than my home...!

For i, too, have realised that life is not centered on us alone -
but in relation to others around us, and the world...
i have come to enjoy a tete-a-tete over coffee with friends -
more than crying alone for the plight of the world...
i have come to value friendship, not just being alone -
and the content and warmth of being loved by others i know...
not just wallow in self-pity, all by myself, all, all, alone -
for i have finally grown into that social being, i now know...

Every night i pray

"There can be miracles - if you believe" -
and that there are things that we can achieve...
so long as we believe - so, i believe, too -
that so long as i believe - i can achieve...

So every night i pray -
that what i believe to be right, is truly right...
and what i feel so strongly, is rightly so -
and that what i achieve is what's rightfully mine...

For i would not want to wish upon a dream -
and then find that it wasn't the best dream to wish for...
i would not want to make a foolish wish upon a star -
to later find out that it was all just make-believe...

So every night i pray -
that what i'm doing is true and right...

Life is one big dream

Yes, that's what i feel -
that life is just one big dream after another...
for when we set off to achieve what we've been dreaming of -
little did we realise that another would soon follow...

So, life is made up of one big dream after another -
and love happens when and wherever cupid points his arrows...
sometimes he is sure, and makes one good strike -
but at times he's not, and makes another go at his matchmaking...?

For me, life started as a tiny little blurry dream -
the tiny dream of a simple little small town girl...
But that little dream has grown into one bigger dream -
and as time passes, it has become one big dream after another...

Oh yes, i still do dream of beautiful dreams -
and yes, i still hope that beautiful dreams will still come true...

Dreaming a thousand dreams

i´ve been caught dreaming again -
dreaming about a thousand little dreams...
i´ve been to places that i´ve dreamt about -
so often in the past, so real nowadays...

i´ve caught myself dreaming again -
about people that i love...
those lovable faces that i´ve left behind -
back in my beloved homeland...

i´ll go on dreaming -
of the day when i return to see loved ones...
the day when i can stop dreaming of home -
till then, life is but one big dream...

"It is like a candle shining in the dark"

"Whenever you say you love me -
it is like a candle shining in the dark..."
for with those three little words -
my heart wants to sing like a happy lark...

And like all who love, i bask in its warmth -
and live only to hear those three little words
that ring out clearly in the dark, music to a lover's ears -
i love you... i love you... i love you...

For love is this strong feeling for another -
that swells the heart and encompasses the soul with joy...
it is the very essence of life itself, and speaks volumes -
and it fills our days with laughter, and generates fun-filled hours...

So, i'm for a life of love - even if it comes without the frills -
for without love, life is a mere existence,a bore, and a chore...

I Love Sunny Days

Oh, yes, i do love the sun on a bright, sunny day -
for its warmth and its cheerful countenance...
for white clouds would be sailing gaily in the blue sky -
and my colourful daisies and lovely roses would be dancing, too...

But when dark clouds start forming in the sky -
obscuring the warmth and the sunny rays of the sun...
my heart is never sad to see the change -
for i love to hear the sound of raindrops, too...

I love to see my gay little daisies smiling so sweetly -
and my gentle roses stretching out their demure hands...
to drink in the honey juices dropping from the gray sky -
and catching the shiny crystals in their dainty palms...

Oh, yes, i love the rain clouds and i love it when it rains -
for rain clouds remind me of my love: like a furious storm...
and rainy days tell of a love story: happy frogs frolicking around -
and of lovers strolling in the park: smiling happily back at each other...

So, give me the gentle hues of a sunrise or the fiery colours at sunset -
or the cumulous rain clouds and the sound of raindrops on my roof...
I'll gladly love them both.

God Sent Me A Friend

When life seemed so dreary, my heart weary -
and my days are filled with drudgery...
God sent me a friend -
to talk to me, and help me find my way home...

And each day when i arise to greet the sun -
i thank God for giving me that friend...
someone to listen to me, and to console me when i'm down -
someone to advise me, and to tell me when i'm wrong...

Thank You, God, for this one friend -
that i'll treasure till the day i die...
thank You, God, for this last friend -
an angel from Heaven, someone God had sent...

That "Spoonful of Sugar"

"One hundred years from now it will not matter
what kind of car i drove,
what kind of house i lived in,
how much money i had in my bank account,
nor what my clothes looked like.
but the world may be a little better,
because i was important in the life of a child,"
was Jolie Kanat's wise words -
and i think so, too...

For what matters most,in the end,is what we have done for others -
not what wealth we have accumulated for ourselves...
and i am glad that i chose to be a teacher -
someone who has many more chances to say "I care"...
someone who is blessed with shaping a child's future -
someone who gets two-hundred new chances to do it every year...

I've done whatever's best and good -
the way i know works best...
the way which, for everyone, is good -
the only way i know, and i could...
for more than 35 years, i've done all i should -
to touch a child's life, and shape it, if i could...

Now that i've come to the last two and a half months -
i'm still trying to make the most out of it and give my best...
so that one day someone will walk up to me and say,
"Thank you, teacher, you have touched my life..."

"Some Dreams Are Worth Keeping"

When we have a dream - like most people do -
we should dream on, and keep it safely there...
for if we dare to dream - like most people do -
we should let it stay - even for a lifetime...

For a dream may be all that we have and own -
if a relationship fails to blossom...
or it may well be the only thing that's ever nice -
if we live in poverty, and in need; in suffering, or in pain...

So, dream on, my friend, do dream on -
and "never lose sight of that dream"
for a dream may one day fall on fertile land -
and sprout a sturdy tree, for all to see...
it might also take root and stand so firm -
that strong winds would shy away, and even cease to be...

"A Weed Is But An Unloved Flower"

A weed is still a flower - no doubts about that -
only that a weed is a flower that has no one to love it...
a beautiful rose may bloom beside the majestic orchid -
but a pink mimosa blooms just as prettily beside the daffodils...

So, why love only the lovely rose, or bougainvillea -
with thorns that do prick an unwary finger... ?
when the poor little thorny mimosa, too -
cries out for some love and attention...?

Why does one reject the fragile little pinkish flower -
that blooms so prettily along an untended path...?
and all that the weary traveller sees is a bush of thorns -
but forget that it could also produce such a fragile beauty...!

So let me love all the unloved mimosas -
or the field full of love grass in full bloom,
that makes pinkish white waves as they sway in the breeze -
and clinging onto trousser legs and long skirts,
with much delight, and craving for just a pinch of love -
of which we grudge, and would not give...

For i was once that little unloved mimosa -
till you shower me with all your tender loving care...
so that i could blossom into that winsome little rose -
that proudly graces your beautiful garden...

"The Beauty of Love"

Someone once asked,"Can there be anything
more beautiful than young love?"
and the answer came,"Yes, there is.
Old love."

So "grow old along with me!
The best is yet to be..."
for i would like you to be holding my hand, still,
as we walk the last lap of our life, together...

And i would love it very much, too -
if you would write me a line or two...
as i would surely, for you do, too -
in the merry month of May each year -
for we don't have too many decades left
to wait for a love note to come our way...

So, our gnarled fingers will be holding a pen -
as our old hearts pour out the beauty of love...
come the merry month of May each year -
till the day we both cease to be...

"One Small Stone, Unforgotten"

You spend your days on earth making history -
making your presence felt, or making others happy...
but when you leave this world, you bring with you nothing -
save the tears and memory, that you leave behind...

You are reduced to a tiny plot of land -
just enough to lie down, to take your long needed rest...
and you are reduced to a name etched on one small stone -
and this, the last wish: may you Rest In Peace...

And that one small stone is sometimes left in the wild, forgotten -
for weeds and reeds and mosses and lichen to grow - long forgotten...
but if you had lived your life selflessly, a life for others -
then yours will be the few lucky stones, left unforgotten...

For someone would be there with fresh flowers, come Saturday morn -
to talk to you with love, or sing a love song or two - your favourites...
and you'll have a friend, stepped down from the plane, who comes to chat -
and pat your one small stone, which is all you have, unforgotten...

And you'll know that you are well-missed and well-loved -
and would be well-remembered, for a long, long time to come...

The Basket We Carry In Life

"Your little basket is in mine when you were born -
'coz there were too many things you couldn't do for yourself:
i had the responsibility of feeding you, changing you, bathing you,
and doing everything else you couldn't do on your own;
so i put your basket in mine and carried them both for a while..."

"As you grew older and began to do some things on your own,
i began placing a few more things in your basket...
and as you grow older, there will be more and more things
you must do on your own"...

"And you will eventually carry your own basket -
with things only you can do:
like deciding whom you want to be friends with,
whom you will date, what college you will go to,
and whom you will marry -
because you decide the things that belong in your basket"...

"One day, when i'm much older -
there will be things i can no longer carry in my basket;
When that time comes, you will eventually
be taking things out of my basket,
and placing them into your own -
just like i do now" for all the grandmas and grandpas...

"Eventually, the things
that are in my basket
will be taken out,
for i won't always be strong enough
to carry everything
i'm carrying right now"...

So, until that day comes, my dear girl -
let me do the worrying, and deciding:
"Just remember, that your basket
isn't nearly as big as you think it is", still...

A different sunrise

I saw a different sunrise over the lake -
and it stays in my mind's eye...
that window into the heart, into the soul -
that insight into what is cherished and treasured...

It was a scene of tranquility, of peace and quiet -
it was a balm for sore a heart, a balm for the soul...
for it spoke of quiet moments in this hectic life -
when the heart can rest, and the soul can sigh in delight...

And it stays etched in my mind, my heart, my soul -
that lovely, tranquil scene in the past
that spoke of love and joy in a world that has lost its heart
that evoked feelings for my love and the joy of being blessed...

Love is still what i feel

Love is still what i feel -
though i'm in my last quarter...
for love has always been there -
a spark, a flame, a roaring fire...

For it is true that love is what i feel -
for the things in life that i love, still...
and love is what i feel, still
when i feel you walking near...

And i can't help feeling -
that love is all that i could ever feel...
to be surrounded by so much beauty -
and love is what i feel when i think of you...

Love Is What I Feel

Love is what i feel - whenever i think of you:
for you have given me the greatest joy -
by giving me your undivided love...
by giving me the chance to love again...

Love is what i feel - whenever you look at me;
for there is a twinkle in your eyes -
something i have not seen before...
it's there - only when you look at me...

Love is what i feel - whenever you are near:
for i know now that it is only me that you care for -
it is only my hand - that you wish to hold, always...
and it is only me - whom you love, wholeheartedly...

So, love is all that i'll ever feel -
whether you are near, or whither you may be...

A Peaceful Town

I see the lake... i see the trees
i see the birds - high up in those trees...
i see the grass, ever so green
i see white clouds sailing above the hills...
i see the sunrise dancing in the lake
i see love twinkle in your eyes...

This is paradise... this is where i would like to be
surrounded by birds, singing in the trees...
naughty little monkeys, swinging from a branch...
bent old uncles and aunties, walking from bench to bench...
a loving pair of lovers, walking hand in hand...
and happy little children running in the park...

This is the town... and this, the lovely lake...
where i would like to stay... and feel the peace...
where i would love to wake up... to watch each sunrise
to stand in awe, mesmerised, at the reflection of life,
and walk round the great lake... with my love by my side...
and feel the joy of living: a joy i can't conceal , a love i cannot hide...

The Disc of Hope and Joy

Oh yes, i love to watch that golden disc of light -
as it peeps over the hill tops, and throws its light on us,
or comes up over the horizon, out of the sea -
a pinkish, reddish ball in the lightening sky...

So, i thank God for my most treasured possession: my eyes
that i would bequeath to some unfortunate blind
who may then gaze in awe, as i have done,
at all the beautiful creations that God wants us to see...

And i thank God for my ability to hear -
not only the lovely melodies from musical instruments...
but also all the lovely sounds of nature...
and all the loving words of praises from all around me...
and the daily pledge of undying love for me...

I thank God for giving me the ability of speech -
that i may thank everyone for what they have done for me...
and that i may sing praises of all the lovely things i see...
that i may say 'I Love You' whenever there's a need to say so...
and that i may preach virtue and sing of joy to the young every day...

Thank You, God, too, for the sharp sense of taste -
that i may enjoy all the lovely dishes before me...
and to tell the sweetness of a mountain stream -
from the bitter after taste of my cup of coffee...
and thank You, too, for the ablility to tell the difference -
of the aroma of roasted coffee from roasted chicken,
and freshly baked bread or butter cookies from freshly cut grass -
and to tell an orange from an apple, or a rose from a lily ...

Thank You, God, for giving me the ability to be discerning -
that i may tell right from wrong...
and so i thank You, God, for this last gift:
the ability to feel -
feelings that are so strong...
and those that last so long...
to touch the hearts of others,
be it near, or far..

"My Heart Leaps Up When I Behold

"My heart leaps up when i behold a rainbow in the sky!
so was it when i was a child, so be it now i'm a man -
or let me die...!" says Wordsworth, and so say i:
if i can no longer find joy in the beauty of nature -
then let me cease to be...

I've always found joy in watching the soft pink hues of a sunrise -
for it gives me hope for a beautiful day of joy...
i've stood mesmerised by the rich colours of a fiery sunset -
for it tells of the close of another beautiful day...
I've gaped in wonder at the lovely coloured bands of a rainbow -
for it engulfs the freshness of a good shower in the sun...
and i would never tire of watching the waves rolling to the beach -
for they are like frolicking lovers chasing each other in joy...

And i would always appreciate this magnanimous gift of great beauty -
that God had created, on earth, for us all to admire, and to enjoy...

The Little Kingfisher

Once i had a wounded kingfisher in a golden cage -
she would not eat the fish i caught for her,
served on a golden platter, into her cage i had put -
no, she would not even take a look...

I was worried for my little kingfisher -
not knowing what else i could do for her...
I'd given her the best that i had: a golden cage -
but still she sat, mournfully quiet in a corner...

On the third morning she was looking not only glum -
but the rich colours of her feather had lost their lustre...
and still she sat, not moving, in her little corner -
and i was really worried, and sorry i could not help any further...

I sat myself down beside that golden cage and looked her in the eye -
and thought i saw a flicker of life - a cry for help - reaching out to me...
i was confused, and i was flustered, i couldn't place that look in her eye -
till it dawned on me, and i could finally understand, her need to be free...!

It was a look that spoke volumes -
and told of a tale i won't forget:
that she needs to be free to fly around -
to choose the fish in the pond or river...
she needs to be able to roam free -
not to be ogled at and fed from a platter...

Finally i had understood: that all she ever wanted -
was to be free - free from the cage, free from me...
all that she ever asked for was to be placed -
back on the picket fence, or on the old gum tree...
away from the crowd, and away from me -
to be allowed to fly free, choose a fish, two, or three...

So, quietly, i opened the tiny door of the cage -
and i, i set my little kingfisher free...
and once in a while, if i look hard -
at the picket fence or the old gum tree:
perched, busily preening or grooming herself -
my happy little kingfisher i would see...

That Stranger In The Mirror

Today i saw the bright sky and knew:
that there would be another beautiful sunrise
to make my day bright and sunny - the way it was -
though the wane moon still hangs in the west...

I thought of things gone by -
foolish deeds and foolish thoughts
that brought about that dreamy look -
in the eyes of young lovers...
and thought, perhaps i'm too old for that?
perhaps, had i been seventeen or twenty-seven -
i, too, would have been dreamy-eyed,
and all flustered, with love?
i, too, would have been starry-eyed,
and all flushed up, with love?

But when one is fifty-seven -
and life is so beautiful...
i suppose one would most contented be -
to be basking in the sun, writing poetry...?
and to talk of young lovers -
as they go about starry-eyed and dreamy-eyed...?

And when i glanced into my rear view mirror -
that stranger smiled happily back at me...

Talking to that Stranger in the Mirror

Today the sun shines white,
through the thick mist, in a whitish sky –
as it often happens on cold mornings,
after a heavy downpour -
when the frogs were dancing in the rain,
in our sleepy old green valley…

And I saw her again –
in the rear mirror, as I was driving:
the same hardened eyes -
though I thought I noticed a tinge of sadness there…
the same hardened lines around the lips -
biting back harsh words that hurt, words that sting…
and it’s the same stubborn jaw,
which seems to say it all,
without having to frame the words -
no, not a word, none at all…

I could tell she was sad – her emotions in turmoil –
from the sad look in the hardened face…
i know that her heart bleeds, too,
at each hurting word – from someone she loves…
i could see that she is calm –
just like the calm before and after a big, big storm…
and I know what is going on in her mind -
from the glazed look in those dark brown eyes…

There are things that she would not say -
and others that she could not voice out, nor say,
but I think I know how she feels, for deep down -
beneath the hard shell, she’s still humane…
and she still bleeds -
and she still cries...
deep down – where it hurts most;
and she has no one to blame:
she brought it all upon herself –
trouble after trouble…

The subdued look of defeat, of acceptance, of remorse -
that I’ve seen before, is there…
and it seems to say that many other dreams are built -
on a broken dream every day;
so why cry over one broken dream,
no matter how great or how sweet it may have been…?
why not dream another dream that is more beautiful –
and just let broken dreams die…?

It's a joy to be free

It's certainly a great joy to be free -
not just physically, but mentally and spiritually, too...
for i'm sure the spirit of every soul wants to be free -
so, a prisoner, behind bars, i hope i'll never ever be...

For i love to run free - on the beach -
in the woods, on the hills, by the brook...
just to be able to run free - to stop to pick a shell -
smell a rose, kiss a caged bird - and set it free...

I love driving around, in the countryside -
up the hill and down, "over vales and dales"...
i love to stop by to admire a wayside flower -
or a tall reed, or a clump of bamboo, or woven nest...
and watch a fiery sunset over the hills lose its fire -
and that twilight moment of a rich pink and midnight blue...

I'ld love to take a walk: along the beach,
by a stream, round a lake, up a hill - even in a park...
And i'd love to do them in my mind -
whenever i'm free to let my mind wander...

I'ld like to do all these -
so, dear God, always let me be free:
to choose the life that i want -
that covers my wishes - of being free...

Another Beautiful Day I See

It's there again, today:
the most beautiful sunrise...
though without that golden cloud
with its golden lining...
it is still the most beautiful sunrise:
'coz you are watching it, too...

I know life is such:
that one has to give some, take some...
but i've always practised what i feel is right:
take what is necessary, but give thrice as much...
to make up for all those who love to take -
but would very grudgingly part with whatever that's theirs...

I've always thought i could teach by being silent,
by trying to be a model of what i 'preach'...
but alas i realise that i need to speak up -
to be heard; and to voice out what is never heard;
for i've been misjudged, all too often -
and my silence misinterpreted, as stubbornness and resistance...
I've been branded a non-conformist -
whenever i try to bring about reforms...
i've been up against the great wall of tradition, of norms -
and many a time i've stopped to fold my battered wings, to rest...

I've always trusted myself, my judgement, my intuition -
but many a time, i've been let down and proven wrong:
in my trust..., my judgement..., my intuition...
so i can understand this need for others to watch over me -
to see that i don't go wrong; that i don't dig myself another grave
in which to lie down - and give up on the whole wide world, again...

For this, i thank you - for your care and your concern -
for this, i promise to be wary, of sad eyes that speak to me...
for this, too, i'll be careful, not to accept smiling eyes too readily, too -
and for this, i thank all of you - for sparing time to watch over me, still...